Burning in the Shadows
by MoonWallker
Summary: A girl starts seeing a dead mech. Is this her imagination? Why is she the only one who could see the ghost of the mech? Secrets of the past of the dead mech are being revealed...
1. Chapter 1

_Burning in the Shadows_

_Chapter one: It's a mad world  
><em>

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><p>'<em>Isn' that supp'sed ta be written with a 'c' not a 'k'?<em>_'_

*huff*

'_I'm jus' sayin'...__'_

*growl*

'_Well, aren't ya in a mood t'day__.'_

"…"

'_So when do ya think he'll let ya go? Last time ya were here for two hours__.'_

"Will you shut up already!" Quietly hissed a blond haired girl.

'_Nope – annoyin' is one of my many, _many_s__pecialties__.'_ The girl could have sworn _it_ actually grinned at her.

"Miss Woods? Is there something you would like to share with the rest of the class?" Her teacher – a man in his mid forties - asked from behind his desk. The said girl looked around the empty classroom because she and the English teacher were the only occupants in it.

"Seriously? " She asked in what resembled annoyance.

"_Don' aggravate 'im. Ah don't wanna spend more time here – it's boring__.__"_ But the girl ignored it and continued to stare at her teacher.

"I'm sure that the essay you're writing could easily be stretched from 1000 to 2000 words, Miss Woods." The teacher crossed his arms. The girl opened her mouth to snort out a response but got _rudely _interrupted.

"_Please, for da love of Primus__,__ don' answer that!"_

"Don't call me Miss Woods – that's my mom. It makes me feel old." She heard a snorting sound, "It's Amber." Amber said leaning in her chair.

"_Sparklin'__,__ ya can't even begin ta __comprehend__th'__ definition of _old._"_

In that moment the bell rang and that was all Amber needed to gather her things and bolt as fast as she could through the door, giving her teacher a simple _'__S__ee ya'_.

"_Finally outta that place. Ah don' care what others think – detention is just like serving brig time – unimaginably boring."_

The blond girl quickened her pace and soon left the school grounds. Luckily, she lived close. Amber unlocked the front door to the house and stepped inside. The TV could be heard playing some sort of a cartoon show.

"Hey squirt, I'm home." Amber called and entered the living room, where a 10 year old was drowsing on the couch.

"Hey sis'." He looked at the clock on the wall, "So, what did you do _this_ time?" The boy asked and returned his gaze to the TV.

"Eh, no big deal – bubble gummed the head cheerleader's hair."

'_An' purposely flooded the ha__ll__s__.'_

Amber's mood suddenly darkened.

"I'm going to my room. Are Mom and Robert back, Alex?"

"Mom's working at the shop, but Dad got home early – I think he's in the garage, tinkering with his old records or something." Alexander shrugged, clearly wanting to pay more attention to the TV.

Amber went upstairs to her room and from there, strait to her bathroom to take a shower. It was the only time she did have piece. After a long shower, Amber emerged dripping wet .

'_So__,__ y__e__r ignoring me__.__A__gain__.'_ It was not a question.

Amber went to her drawer to search for clothes.

'_That tactic so far hasn't work, so why repeat it__' _

The girl closed her drawer little more roughly, causing her possessions on top of it to shake.

"That sounds like something _he_ would say, don't you think?" Amber finally spoke _to_ him and not _at_ him.

'_So ya have been listening__.'_ Again, Amber had the feeling that he was smirking.

"Hard not to, with you bragging about him most of the time." She started dressing.

'_Well, when ya haven't spoken to someone__ – anyone -__ in four Earth years__,__ ya kinda le__e__ch __o__n to the first thing that could actually hear ya__.'_ When Amber didn't respond he continued speaking, but this time his tone turned more serious.

'_So when are ya going to help me go back to them?__'_ At this, the girl turned sharply to look at him.

"I'm not obligated to help you – at all. For all I can understand, you're a glowing blue orb of light that's probably a part of my imagination." Amber narrowed her eyes at the light that was hovering over her desk.

'_There we go __with that again__ . Ah'm very much _real._'_

"And very much dead." Amber immediately regretted saying those words, "Sorry." She muttered actually feeling bad. " You know what I mean"

"_It's alright sparkling. For all I care ya could insult me as long as I get to talk to some one. I've told you before – my species is one that is in need of constant socialization__,__ otherwise we'll go insane__.__"_

She wanted to protest about the title of 'sparkling' (he had explained a lot of terms to Amber) but considering their life span and her age, she pretty much fitted that description. Being 13 Amber actually often got confused as a kid.

"But what about your, uhh, what was it? Bonded? You said he spends most of his time in his office doing boring reports, not socializing with anyone."

'_He doesn' need it that much. It's in his programmin' an' plus__,__ as SIC__,__ he has enough communication with others on daily basis__.'_By this point Amber was brushing her hair while the light was glowing brightly in front of her.

After a slightly unconformable silence the girl put down the brush and looked at the light.

"Why don't you just pass on?" Amber asked in a quiet voice. It was not the first time she asked that. The light didn't answer at first and Amber thought that he wasn't going to answer her at all.

'_Because Ah promised Ah would never leave without him. Plus, he needs me now more than ever.__'_ He answered, floating close to her face. Amber resisted the urge to gently reach out and caress him. That didn't explain much – it actually made her slightly more confused.

"Even if I agree to help you, I wouldn't know how. First, there's the fact that you may be just a fragment of my imagination and that I'm insane. And even if you _were_ real, what am I supposed to do?"

'_Ah've spent the __last half an year__ with y__a__. For my species__,__ that is a very little fragment of time, so I'm still not too late to help him and during that time__,__ I've come to realize that you are more than capable of helping me__.'_

At this, Amber snorted."For an intergalactic-alien-space-robot, you sure are sappy."

'_...You'll get along wonderfully with __the__ twins__ I told ya about__.__'_ She was about to reply when suddenly there was knock on her door and Robert peaked in.

"Got called from your school today." At this Amber narrowed her eyes. She knew where this was going.

"And yet another reason for you to ship me off to boarding school." She crossed her arms, the light hovering over her head, but the human adult in the room couldn't see it.

"You can't keep this up. What's next? Bailing you out of jail?" Amber glared at her feet. "Listen here Missy, because you have only a couple of years left until you reach majority, I'm putting up with your attitude. If I get one more call, there _will_ be consequences."

Amber wasn't afraid. Robert had never abused her in any physical kind of way. Even if he was a complete jerk most of the time, he was not an abusive one.

"You're to stay in your room until further notice." And with that, Robert left.

"He's not the only one who can't wait for me be eighteen." Amber muttered. She as well wanted to leave. There was nothing she hated more than staying in place where you were clearly unwanted.

'_If he's not ya'r biological sire why does he live with ya'r carier?__'_The light went to hover next to some pictures on the wall of Amber and her biological father.

Amber wasn't in the mood to explain old wounds. She went to her bed and and flopped down, closing her eyes. If she was going crazy, she might as well take advantage of it.

"Could...could you sing to me again..._Jazz_?" She asked in a more quieter voice. And not long after, a song could be heard in the quietness on the room. Amber smiled gently, knowing she was the _only_ one who could hear it.

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><p>Reviews are very much welcomed.<p>

**TBC...**


	2. Chapter 2

_Burning in the Shadowls_

_Chapter two: Decision_

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><p>"<em>Ok, so where are we goin'?"<em>

"Surprise"

"_What kinda su'prise?"_

"A good one"

"_Wh-"_

"God, Jazz! How did your friends ever surprised you if didn't stop bugging them for answers?" Amber asked finally getting irritated.

"_Till da point they tell me and then Ah pretend ta be su'prised"_ She could have sworn that there was smugness in his voice. Amber was about to retort about his absurd explanation when suddenly the buss they were riding in made a rather sharp turn. A standing passenger went through Jazz, causing him to shudder.

"_How further?"_ He asked flowing more closely to the sitting Amber.

"Not much, just two more stops" She shrugged and adjusted her phone to her ear. Well, at least no one will think she's crazy.

"_Ah gotta say Ah'm impressed. A whole week and no detention."_ The blonde smirked. She was free for the rest of the afternoon on a Friday with no school tomorrow, when an idea popped in her head.

"Yeah,well you herd what Robert said. Boarding school's not really my taste"

"_Sparklin', knowing you, the school wouldn't have survived a month" _Jazz chuckled.

"Jazz you insult me" She faked being offended "A week, top's" She herd the wonderful sound of Jazz's laughter and stood up when the buss stopped.

"This is our stop." She told him and left her phone in her bag-pack.

They stood in front of a large building with a rather odd shape. There were a lot of stairs and it was filled with tourists. There appeared to be college students giving up pamphlets, a couple of souvenir shops, and over the entrance with large letters was engraved _"Nibble's Planetarium" _

"_What's a '_planetarium'_"_ Amber giggled slightly at the way he said it for the first time.

She didn't answer him and started walking toward the entrance. There she paid the clerk for her ticket and entered. The moment she stepped inside it took her breath away.

"_It's beautiful ain' it?"_ Suddenly Jazz ask fluttering next to her right ear.

"Space..." Whispered. "I actually brought you here to show me Cybertron, if possible." She murmured when no one was looking.

"_Ya really are interested in the stories Ah tell ya"_ It was not a question. Amber snorted and rolled her eyes, entering further into the building. The halls were filled with pictures of all kinds of planets, solar systems, galaxies, moons and just about everything. Amber carefully studies each and everyone, reading the text below the pictures.

"_Hey, Ah've actually been here."_ At this her head snapped and looked over at the glowing light that was hovering next to a picture of an orange/reddish planet with three suns.

"_Ah don't have ma memory banks so ah can't tell exactly in witch quarter it's located. There used ta live some sort of organics, herd it was very beautiful back then."_ The blue orb was almost touching the large picture.

"But didn't you say you visited it?" Amber whispered again, making sure no one saw her.

"_Ah did, but that was after their species died. There used ta be a fourth sun, but it extinguished, causing da extinction of the entire race."_

"That's sad" She murmured. "What is that?" She asked referring to a crater on the left side of the planet.

"_Weeell, that kinda is ma fault."_

"What?" She attracted a couple of curies glances her way. Blushing madly she whispered harshly.

"What the hell do you mean it's _your fault_ – that thing's about the size of Canada."

"_Sorry, but when 'cons are hot on ye'r aft's ya don' exactly make da most gracious of landings. Prowl was really pissed tough."_ Jazz trailed off.

"Because of the 'cons or your landing?" She resisted a giggle. If Jazz could, he would have grinned.

"_Both"_ Amber full out laughed attracting the attention of quite a few people but was having too much of a good time to pay them attention.

Not long after she was seated in a gallery. Jazz was in front of her chest. If he was able to be solid he would have been sitting on her lap. The lights dimmed and above their heads was projected a hologram of stars.

"It must have been amazing... from galaxy to galaxy..." She whispered but Jazz's answer was not the one she expected.

"_Ah never asked for any of it. Before the war, durin' da Godel Age, Ah had a life. Prowler and I, we... lets just say the war didn't give us a choice"_ He muttered and in the dark room Amber could see that the blue orb actually dimmed. She gently ran a hand trough it in a soothing manner.

She was about to repeat the motion when Jazz suddenly flew away from her. At first she got worried that maybe she hurt him but that fear didn't last long.

"_That!"_ He yelled gaining her attention. _"Do ya see it? It's small but it's definitely Cybertron!"_ He was circling around a small star on the ceiling were it was being projected. Jazz stopped fluttering around it and just watched.

Her heart broke. Even if Jazz didn't have a face where she could see his expression, the now dim orb was radiating desperation.

"_Home..."_Jazz whispered not sure if Amber heard him. He lingered around it for a while and returned to her when the projection was changed.

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><p>"Jazz, I'm sorry. I never meant to upset you." Amber quietly said at the buss stop. A small key-chain she had bought as a souvenir was held tightly in her right hand.<p>

"Don'. Ah'm actually grateful. Without my memory banks I couldn't remember Cybertron at all since Ah haven' seen in in quite some time. Thank ya for helping me remember." The blue orb slightly nuzzled her neck.

Amber smiled. This was actually the first time Jazz thanked her for anything. Right now, at this moment, she couldn't believe she ignored and even tried to get rid of blue orb. Just the thought of making him even remotely happy made her smile. Actually...

"Jazz, what do I have to do in order to help you?"

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><p><strong>If one more plot bunnie comes near me I'm gonna sic my dog on them! Grrr. Anyway I hope you like the new chap. enough to leave a review :D I actually came up with it while studying physics :)<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

_Burning in the Shadows_

_Chapter three : Determination_

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><p>"<em>Whats that supposed ta be?"<em> A blue light hovered over the sheet of paper Amber was sketching on.

"Man , I suck at drawing" She muttered before answering. "It's a generator that uses solar energy. I'm doing it for the science fair. If I win first prize I get 500 bucks. More than enough for us to start traveling" She continued to draw adding some sort of physics formulas in it.

"_For some one who is horrible at literature ya sure do know yer stuff"_ Amber huffed.

"Literature, History, Geography – I suck at those. But give me math and science and I'll get you a triple A plus."

"_Aren't you the confident one"_ He snickered but suddenly backed away _"It's not going to explode right?" _

"What?Explode?" She looked at him confused, but then narrowed her eyes at him. "Jazz, I'm not that crazy inventor you spoke of."

"_Ah don' know – because of him Ah have developed a phobia of Engineers and anything remotely sciencecy."_

"Is that even a word?" She started to erase a couple of numbers that she wasn't pleased with.

"_Sparklin' if ya ever meet Wheeljack and some of his experiments explode - which they will – Ah will tell ya with all of ma spark – Ah told ya so"_ Amber rolled her eyes.

"In about two weeks we'll leave" She stated, tone slightly sobering up.

"_What about yer family?"_ Amber stopped working on her project and stared at space.

"I don't care" She finally stated "Mom, sure as hell didn't care to wait even an year after Dad died to remarry again." He voice slightly raised.

"_From what ya've told me, your sire reminds me of Prowl"_ Amber chuckled, dark mood lifting.

"You do realize there hasn't been a day you haven't spoken to me about Prowl, right?"

"_Yep!"_ She chuckled.

Suddenly her door opened and her mom entered.

"Jesus, have you ever herd of knocking?" Amber asked irritated.

"Since when do I have to knock in my own house?" A darker blonde woman asked. "Anyway I came to tell you that this weekend were going to Portland to visit Roberts parents."

Amber just about swallowed her tongue.

"...What?" She choked out.

"We can't back out now – we've planed this for over a month" The older woman explained reasonably.

"And you decide to tell me _now_? It's Tuesday mom!" She slightly raised her voice "I've got the science fair next week! Do you know how much work and planing I've put into it?" Jazz was in front of her, floating in a soothing manner.

"Well, I'm sorry but it's final" And her mom left without looking back. Amber just stood there trying to figure out _'what the hell just happened?'_

"_Am?"_ Jazz used her nickname. She didn't respond

"_Amber, ya ok?"_ He asked again. Did she glitch? Could humans even glitch? Because this one did.

Amber threw her project across the room, went to her bed, buried her head in her pillow and _screamed_. And screamed, and screamed, and screamed to the point where Jazz thought she'd short circuit or something.

"_Try countin' ta ten – it always worked with Sunny"_ At this she raised her head from the pillow and give him a look.

"_Yeah, Ratch' said it wouldn't work and Prowl got tired of locking him up in the brig since he got easily provoked" _Explained Jazz. By now she was lying on her right side, watching the blue orb in front of her.

"I-Is it because they were commissioned?" Jazz regarded her for moment.

"_Yes. The twins were specifically built fer war – which meant their programmin' was just as well. The problem was that they didn' anticipate twins"_ He explained and got closer.

"_Before Ah became head of Special Opps my former boss asked meh to reprogram him"_ This was new. He never told her that. Amber stood up in distress.

"But wouldn't that destroy who he is?" She asked in alarm "Did you do it?"

"_Not exactly – see before the war my function was to write music but that also gave me a lot of knowledge on how to create programs and software's" _Which meant viruses as well, but he didn't mention it.

"But what does this have to do with anything?" She asked confused .

"_Everythin' sparklin'. Ah didn't reprogram him – Ah created an inhibitor program. Every time he started gettin' spiked up, all he needs ta do is count ta ten – it's more then enough time fer the program ta work it's magic"_

Amber smiled "Leave it to you to find a solution that will suit both parties"

"_Eh, what can Ah say? Ah live to please"_ If he could, he would have grinned. Amber rolled her eyes but her dark mood returned. The distraction worked, but now action needed to be taken.

She went next to the pictures on the wall and took down her favorite one – where she and her brother – Alex and their real Dad, still in police uniform was hugging them, while leaning on his police car. She turned back looking determined.

"Pack your things Jazz – we're leaving"

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><p><strong>ATTENTION : I'M SEARCHING FOR A BETA - READER! As you can see I really need one, so if someone us willing to I would be grateful!<br>**

**Short, I know but that means I'll update the new chapter sooner and it'll be longer, so patience my young padawans :D**

**Ohh! And during chemistry class, there was a really cute explosion! Che, you would think that in pre - med school they would teach you the safety rules first. I knew that sodium is really, _really_ reactive towards water but how was I supposed to know it would actually blow up? (well, I did know but didn't believe it and maybe I'm little exaggerating but there was a really loud sound like a gun being fired *shrugs*) So I totally had a Wheeljack moment! Now I know why he loves his job! After class, when the teacher stopped lecturing me I was grinning like mad . My boyfriend was actually worried my face would break :D**


	4. Chapter 4

_Burning in the Shadows_

_Chapter four : Nightmare_

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><p>The room was dark. The night was chilly and with the open window, the room was rather cool. But that didn't seam to register to Amber as she trashed in her sleep. Sweat could be seen on her face due to the dim light the moon was giving. A light hover near her head.<p>

"Dad!" She bolted up. Heavy panting could be herd in the quiet of the night. She looked around the room, searching for something and when she finally spotted it, slightly calmed down.

"Jazz, your here.. your _always_ here" Relief was evident in her voice. The blue orb closed the distance between them. Amber reached a hand to touch it, only to have it pass right through it. She chocked a sob.

"God, how I wish I could touch you, just once..." Jazz slightly nuzzled her neck, careful not to pass right trough her.

"_...Ah've never seen a human have a nightmare this close before" _She sighted but said nothing.

"_In a way Ah think ye'r lucky"_ He started. "_Ya get ta wake up from ye'r nightmares – Ah don't"_ The last part was almost a whisper. Again she regretted not being able to touch him, to comfort him.

Jazz had told her many stories about his past, most of them were filled with laughter and rather funny and pleasant moments. But lately the more she got to talk to him, the more he opened up to her – the more she got to realize that under all of the happy attitude stood a broken by war mech, who's only desire is to be with the one he loves.

Jazz went to hover over the mirror on the wall, looking at his reflection.

"_Do ya wanna know my nightmare? The one Ah can't seem to wake up from?" _Amber slightly nodded. He paused, wondering how to start.

"_Ah tough Ah was gonna go insane." _He started up again still in front of the mirror_ "Ah couldn't talk no anybody, and no one could hear me to answer. At a point Ah started loosing touch with reality, got frustrated, angry and then... just desperate. Ah can't even count the hours Ah spent yelling for someone – anyone to answer. And when no one did Ah just yelled louder." _

Amber watched him with sad eyes as he went to linger over the photos of herself and her real dad.

"_All I ever wanted was to be with Prowl – my Prowl. That's it, nothing more, nothing less. And Ah searched, Primus did Ah search. Not only Ah couldn't find him but Ah couldn't even feel him in ma spark. At some point Ah started believing that Ah was in the Pit, that Ah was being punished." _

At the curios glance Amber gave him, he chuckled darkly.

"_Ah did some horrible things Amber, some very horrible things that Ah doubt they ever could be redeemed" _When the girl said nothing he continued.

"_An' then Ah did the one thing Ah though Ah would never do – Ah gave up."_ Amber stood up, her body finally calmed down enough to feel the cold of the night. She went next to him next to the pictures.

"_Primus Ah miss him"_ She had to hold back her tears. She didn't know if robots could cry but that was a sob she won't be able to forget.

"_Ah want him back. Ah just want mah Prowler back" _The blue orb got so dim that Amber feared he would fade away. On instinct she ran her hands over him, but they just went right through him.

Jazz noticed that she was slightly shivering.

"_Ah can't remember..."_ He started.

"Jazz." She wanted him to stop, not trusting herself to hold back back the tears anymore.

"_Ah can't remember what cold feels like. Heat, hunger, physical pain – Ah can't remember!" _He suddenly started glowing very bright, anger evident in his voice.

"Jazz!" She raised her voice. What triggered this? Why is he all of a sudden opening up to her. Sure, he had done it in the past – but never this deep.

"_Prowl, Prowl, Prowl... Ah just want my Prowl"_ Tears started to fall from her eyes.

"_Ah want Prowl, Ah want to go home." _Her body moved on it's own. Her arms reached around the orb, clutching it close to her chest as she fell on her knees while holding him.

"Jazz..." She choked. When was the last time she cried?

"_And then Ah saw you. You were looking _at_ me, not _through_ me. Ah knew then that you had ta help me find my Prowl"_ Soft sniffs could be herd from the girl as she held him tight. None of them registered that she was able to touch him until Jazz felt something.

"_Ye'r cryin'..."_ He whispered as another tear fell from her face and on to the orb.

"Because _you_ can't..." She whispered not trusting her voice. He was feeling it – wetness. For the first time in almost five years he was actually feeling something else than his emotions.

"_Ah don't know how yer doin' this – all of it. Seeing meh, hearing meh...holding meh." _She held him even closer. She looked at the pictures of her Dad.

"I promised you didn't I?" She never tore her gaze from the pictures "We'll find Prowl – one way or another." She whispered and looked at the open window when she herd the wind shaking the branches of the trees.

"_Ah want mah Prowler back."_

"I know."

"_I want my family back."_

"I know."

She just held him tighter when the wind picked up again sending her shivers.

"I know."

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><p><strong>Sorry. I really am for uploading this so late. I even found a beta-reader for it but I got so busy I never sent it. My apologies.<strong>

**This chapter is dedicated to the awesome bee-roxs98 (who was going to be my beta-reader - thank you Hun!) and to Zayren Heart for her incredible support. Thank you.**

**I'm touched how many people faved, alerted and most of all reviewed. You guys are wonderful!**

**Life if very hectic now. My family and I are moving. I have a lot of studding to do and tones of other thing on my hands. So I have no idea when the next update will be. There will be eventually - I just don't know when.**

**Thank for the support! XOXOX**

**Sincerely - MoonWallker**


	5. Chapter 5

_Burning in the Shadows_

_Chapter five : All good thing's must come to an end_

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><p>"Shhh, you'll wake up the others!" Amber hissed.<p>

"Don't you 'shhh' me! What kind of a normal person sneaks in the middle of the night in my room?" Amber's little brother hissed back in a shouting whisper.

Amber bit her lip "The kind that's leaving and wanted to say goodbye."

Alex, her little brother, seemed frozen for a minute before responding"...Your leaving?" Amber closed her eyes. She never expected it be so hard to say goodbye.

"Yeah squirt. Don't know for how long or when I get back- and I will come back... but I gotta go." She took his hand in her own in a need for some physical comfort.

Alex shook his head in disbelief. "You've done a lot of crazy stunts in past Am, but this is going overboard. I know you don't like Robert or the fact how Mom's being all ignorant and all but-" She cut of his rambling by tugging his hand in order to hug him.

"Alex. This is not just about them. I promised someone I'd help them." She pulled back looking into his eyes, which was rather difficult in the dimly lit room. The only source of light was the blue orb glowing near the door. "And I am not going to break that promise."

"...But what about me?" Amber looked sadly at her ten year old brother.

"Your so mature for your age..." She whispered in a jokingly way, with a small smile but Alex looked away.

"Promise me you'll be back." It was not a request, but a demand Amber could see the fiery determination in his eyes. Amber smirked in pride at his spirit.

"And let Robert get rid of me that easily? - No way" Alex giggled and started Amber when he suddenly stood up. He went over to his drawer and pulled out a whole clip of dollar bills he had stashed away.

"It's not much – I think it's around $200. But it should help you." He held out the money for her her but Amber didn't take accept it.

"Alex...where did you get all of this money from?" Amber breathed out in shock, the boy grinned at his sisters' expression.

"You're the one who taught me how to play poker – I'm just using the gift." Alex said with a sly smile, Amber's eyes widened.

"The gift that Dad forbid you to use!" Amber smack Alex over the head. "I was grounded for two weeks for teaching you!"

"Shhh!" Alex forced her to take the money. She looked at Jazz, and Jazz knew what she would have been saying: can't I tell him?

"No sparklin' – bad enough I'm involvin' ya in dis whole mess." Jazz pulsed a little bit brighter, only by a fraction, with each syllable.

"I'll be seeing you squirt." She kissed his forehead and kept his forehead connected to her lips just a little longer. "Do try and stall things if you can?" Amber ruffled his hair.

"You better see me. I can't believe your leaving one month before Halloween!" Alex said this being half serious half joking.

"Am, we gotta go" She heard Jazz.

"Don't worry – I will do my best to see you again squirt." And with that she stood up from his bed. Her backpack slung over her shoulder filled with all of the necessities. Her Dad had taught her a fair bit about camping.

She locked the front door and looked at her house in general. She saw Alex by the window.

"You know... I never really liked this place and yet..." She stopped herself not trusting her voice anymore when it broke at the last word.

"Ah'm sorry. Ah'm so sorry sweetspark that Ah'm making you do this," Jazz nuzzled her neck trying to give her comfort. She stroked a hand over him lightly and started to walk away not turning back. Sweetspark, she recalled him saying. Was that like sweetheart? Jazz never called her that before...She shook her head and looked at him.

"So, where does this Sam Witwicky live?" She asked riding her mind of what Jazz called her.

"A place called Tranquility. At least he lived there four years ago..."

"Great." Muttered Amber. She zipped her jacked all the way up – it was September and yet is was already so cold. Maybe it was that fact that it was really late at night or very early in the morning.

"We'll travel by train – it's slower but easier to get tickets." She explained while heading for the train station.

"Sparklin'... You 'ave ta understand that this is war your getting yourself inta." He said all business now.

"I know but what would you rather I do? Just let you fade?" Subconsciously she quickened her pace.

"After Ah became head of Special Operations all new recruits were filtered by me. All of them that passed I tough them one single rule – trust no one" Amber stopped.

"Why are you telling me this?" Jazz hesitated

"Your government has done some pretty bad things in the past that I'm sure they won't hesitate to repeat in the future. Ah can't protect ya sparklin'..." Amber resumed walking.

"You won't need to. We just have to find Prowl and everything will be okay." If she reassure herself or Jazz, no one knew. The glowing blue orb did not answer – he could no longer bring himself to lie to her...

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><p><strong>See the difference? This one was beta read! By the awesome <em><span>bee-rox98<span>_ ! As you can see she is amazing! I bow to your greatness hun!**

**TBC...**


	6. Chapter 6

_Burning in the Shadows_

_Chapter six : Put your hands into the fire._

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><p>Amber was snuggled comfortably in her seat on the train she was currently on. It hadn't stopped raining for almost five days now. She was going south for God's sake – it was supposed to get warmer, <em>not<em>colder.

_"An energon fer yer thoughts?"_Jazz was 'resting' on her lap. Now that she was actually able to touch him, Amber found out he was actually quite warm.

"Hmmm?" Amber tiredly looked at him. It had been a hard few days. "Just thinking…" Amber then snarled. "The stupid cops haven't stopped bothering us, or more well me. It's really hard for me to lay low and stay there." And it was true. No hotels or motels for that manner would accept her. Even if they did, they called the authorities and she would have to flee. It was the reason she was so drained.

_"Don' worry. Tranquility isn't to far away now, has nice whether too."_

"Jazz, if only the weather was my problem..." If Jazz could have, he would have frowned at her. From the time he had spent around her this was definitely not her normal behavior.

_"Wanna hear a story?"_When Amber shivered, he tried to radiate more warmth for her.

"If this is going to be about where little bots come from, don't. I'm already enough traumatized as it is. Vector sigma? Spark bonds? Way to complicated for my human brain, Jazzy."

_"No, no. Nothin' like that sparkling!"_ He hovered a little higher in front of her. _"Do ya wanna know how Prowler and Ah met?"_

She looked at him curiously. "Didn't you two work together, or something like that?"

Jazz chuckled. _"Yeah, we both are enforcers at the time. But the first time he and Ah met was when he tried ta arrest me."_

"No way!" Amber shook her sluggishness of and stared at him with pure, innocent interest.

_"Way."_Jazz laughed.

"Well, knowing you, you probably disturbed the peace or something." The blonde shrugged but waited patiently for him to continue.

_"Actually nothin' of the sort."_ Jazz focused his attention on the key-chain she got from that planetarium they visited. She hadn't stopped wearing it since then. _"It was mah first day at work. But since I transferred so suddenly from mah last work place, none of them bothered to give meh the access keys of the building."_

Jazz floated over next to the key-chain. _"Remember Ah told ya before, I used ta write music?"_

"Yeah…Which meant you know how to write programs. So what? You wrote a program to sneak in?"

_"Yer… Ya one of mah best listeners, ya know that?"_Amber rolled her eyes and urged him to continue with her hand rotating it in a circle.

_"Well 'Mister Chief Enforcer' thought I was some sort of criminal tryin' to break in. He tried ta __arrest me. Ah of course made things difficult, made a scene. Pit, Ah didn't even know _he_ was an enforcer. Then Ah tried to arrest him."_

The young human full out laughed. "Man, I wish I could see that! I bet it was hilarious!"

_"Frag yeah it was!"_ Amber could here the grin on Jazz's face even though she couldn't see it. _"The bot's around it figured it out soon but the two of us were in such a heated discussion that we didn't even notice what was going on 'round us. Sparklin' you should have seen us. We were on fire. Well, at least that's what they told us…"_Jazz shrugged to himself at the memory. It might have cheered Amber but it made him feel even more nostalgic and home sick.

The blonde regarded him for a moment. He may not have a face she could read but the time they had spent together had thought her how to read the glowing orb. She knew she shouldn't push the subject more, but there was this need to know.

It fascinated her to no end. An entire different alien species and yet, they had so much in common. They could laugh, cry, smile – they could _feel_, just like a normal human being. Maybe they weren't so different after all.

"So how did you two… you know? Get together? If you hated each other from the start?" Weariness completely forgotten, she waited for his answer. In the quiet room in the train compartment they were seated only the rain drops on the outside could be heard, because the train had stopped.

Jazz looked at her. He started digging in the old wound – he would finish it. _"Huh,"_ He chuckled. _"We made each other miserable for the next two vorns. But then Prowl was in load of trouble and I found mah self with the burning need to help him. After this incident we got closer. We actually started to enjoy our bickering. That lasted for about only a couple of vorns…"_The orb dimmed.

"What happened then?" The girl quietly asked.

_"Then it was mah turn to get in deep __slag__. Ah almost lost mah life as well in da process." _He flew closer to her. _"After this Prowler and I, well, let meh just say, we had our optics opened. We finally saw the other more then before, and liked what we saw. We both realized we needed each other. We couldn't go a cycle with out seeing each other. It was like a thirst that not even the sweetest of energon could clench." _

Amber leaned on her seat, a small barely-there-smile on her lips. So there was the difference she was searching for. It saddened her that humans weren't capable of feeling such deep emotions. But in a way it was better this way. If happiness was ten times stronger, then that means pain as well was ten times more painful.

"Thank you for sharing this with me-"

_"Get off da train now!"_

"What? Why?" She asked slightly in alarm.

_"Hurry! We'll miss him! Get out now!"_

"In the rain? Outside? Jazz, our stop isn't-"

_"Listen to me!"_He exploded and Amber quickly grabbed her stuff and exited the train. It only took her half a minute to get soaked in the rain.

"What the hell is your problem Jazz?" She exclaimed, in a very off tone. For someone so small she sure knew how to bark.

_"That's one of my kind! Look!"_He flew in front of her.

Parked outside the train station stood a silver Lamborghini.

"That car over there?" She asked confused. She knew that even if the rain couldn't harm them, Jazz had told her that the rain reminded them of the acid rains back on Cybertron, so most of them avoided it. But there it was, perfectly still under the rain.

"Who is that?" Amber asked as she bee-lined next to it.

_"It's Sideswipe. Not the best of choice in situations like this one, but better than no bot."_ Jazz looked at her _"Go on! Talk to him. He can help us."_Jazz urged, hopefulness in his voice.

"I get to meet one of the lambo twins? Sweet!" She grinned, even soaked to the bone.

"Um, hello there?" Maybe this was more difficult than she thought. "Sideswipe, right?" The car still didn't move. "Jazz, he doesn't respond. Maybe your wrong…" She hugged herself. It was getting colder.

_"Oh trust me, Ah'm not bitlet. Ah could recognize his carcass anywhere, no matter what color he wore"_Was that amusement she was hearing in his voice?

"If you say so..." She turned her attention to the car in front of her "Ok, please be the real Sideswipe otherwise I'm screwed. Ok...um, strait to the point then. So I'm Amber and about 5 months ago I started seeing this ghost-"

_"Spark."_Jazz corrected her

"...The spark." She glared at Jazz. "Of your comrade – Jazz." The car remained impassive. Amber sneezed and got even more annoyed. "Oi! I'm talking to you, you tin can! I can see your dead friend! Does that compute with you! Fine, don't believe me? Then how do I know this, huh? How do I know that you're the Autobot Sideswipe, twin brother of Sunstreaker, who by the way is an artist, but only a few bots know that! Both of you were commissioned for war and Jazz here-" She used her thumb to point at Jazz."-Jazz here helped with Sunny's anger management. Do I…need...to...go... on?" She squeaked at the last part.

Amber expected a lot of things, not this one. The car's door opened with much force, it pushed her over. Amber growled, but saw Jazz slip in, so, she followed. But when she was in, the door slammed shut all the locks went in.

Amber then realized there were a couple of blades in her face. "Who the frag are you and how do you know all of this?" A metallic voice demanded loudly. The young blond could only watch in pure fear, as the two blades got closer to her face. Didn't Jazz say that the Autobots were the good guys and weren't allowed to hurt humans?

* * *

><p><strong>Long time since I updated - sorry. RL is just that annoying.<strong>

**Special thank you for _bee-rox98_. She is the best beta-reader ever! Thank you so much! ^^**

**Stay tuned for next time! **

**~MoonWallker~**


	7. Chapter 7

_Burning in the shadows_

_Chapter seven : Echo_

* * *

><p>It was quiet. Too quiet. The only sound that could be herd was the heavy falling of the rain against the car's hood. In another circumstances this would have need considered calming...but for Amber the outside world didn't exist.<p>

She didn't notice the nice aroma the leather seats produced, didn't appreciate the gorgeous form the car possessed and didn't hear the falling rain from the pounding of her heart in her ears. The only thing that she registered was the twin blades that were dangerously close to her face and nothing else mattered. She didn't know she was shivering until she tried to speak. For her later disappointment it was just barely above a whisper.

"S-Sideswipe?"

The silence in the car was disturbed by the deep rumble of the car's engine.

* * *

><p>In the many years Sideswipe had lived he had been called many things – mischievous, rash, troublemaker. And as the war progressed so did the callings – scary, dangerous, skilled, a warrior, ruthless, murderer, a <em>daemon.<em>

But even then he had principals. Principals he bestowed on himself and strictly follows even today. There are two things that were unique for Sideswipe :

One, he _never_ lied. Never. No matter how much it hurt he always told the truth.

Second, Sideswipe _cared_. For every life he took a small part of him still hurt. Maybe that's what made Sunstreaker a better warrior than him. His brother once told him, in the dark arenas of the gladiator rings that if he wanted to survive it was only if he stopped caring.

Sideswipe refused to give away the only thing that separated him from becoming a beast.

And maybe that's why he stood here today, under the hard rain in nowhere. He chastised himself for letting Jolt's words get to him. In a way he didn't blame him – every 'bot had the right to their own opinion. But to think that Jolt and most of the other Autobots thought of him as someone who didn't care, someone who was glad his brother was away to give him piece but most of all, someone who _enjoyed_ this war... A war that has brought nothing but pain in his life...Now as ignorant as Sideswipe is, that was a tad to much.

Sideswipe cared.

Sideswipe loved his brother.

Sideswipe hated war.

If it wasn't for this war he and his brother wouldn't have existed. Sometimes he thought maybe it was better if they didn't. But then his brother reminded him that they were given a chance. A chance to live, no matter how miserable of life it was. His brother was his reason to live. Because his brother always reminded him that life without living it was just mere, pitiful existence.

So Sideswipe lived. For himself, for his brother, for all the things that he cared about.

But certainly not for this or any other war.

So when Sideswipe herd what most of the humans and Jolt though of him and his brother, the silver warrior had to leave otherwise he would have done something he would have regretted.

He drove, and drove, and drove until his engine protested and he had to stop.

The rain felt calming to him. Strangely it didn't remind him of the acid rains back on Cybertron. The rain calmed him. It cooled down his boiling temper and in a strange way soothed his pain.

That calmness disappeared the moment he saw _her_.

* * *

><p>"I'm not going to repeat my self fleshling! I asked how do you know all this stuff?" His blades touched her skin but didn't damage it. Amber gulped and tried to stop the shaking of her body as best as she could. For a second she looked at Jazz but returned her gaze at the blades pointed at her.<p>

"I-I'm Amber" She swallowed "And everything I told you is true. I can see the spark of your friend Jazz"

The cars engine rumbled again and the blades pressed harder on her skin but the force still wasn't strong enough to pierce it.

"Lies. Jazz is deactivated. Dead. His spark is long gone to the Well of Sparks" The metallic voice seemed to come out of nowhere.

"It's true!" Amber raised her voice, her old self coming back "How else would I know all of this? How did I know you were and Autobot?"

"Even a decepticon rookie spy could have gathered that information. Now give me something better before I behead you" The cars engine rumbled again, sounding strangely like a growl.

Sideswipe bluffed. He wasn't going to hurt this human. It was against strict orders. Optimus would have his aft he finds out he broke that rule.

Amber looked at Jazz. "What should I tell him?" Strangely she didn't feel as afraid as before. The more she spoke to this car the more the fear left her.

"Who are you speaking to fleshling?"

"Who else?" She slightly smirked but pressed herself deeper into the seat, fearing the blades.

"Jazz?" The car asked.

"_Ya know, if Ah leave you two alone Ah wonder who's gonna push more buttons. You or him?"_ Jazz spoke but noted to himself that if the girl was Cybertronian she would have made a good spy. She was rather calm under stressful situations.

"Now is not the time for this dammit! Just tell me something useful Jazz" She looked at the blades "Please" Amber whispered. She was not as calm as Jazz would like her to be.

The floating spark regarded her. He knew she was scared. Who wouldn't? So he started thinking. He flew out of the car, easily passing trough it, ignoring Amber's protest. He watched Sideswipe under the rain for a couple of minutes and then returned.

"Don't just leave me alone with this psychopath Jazz!" Amber hissed. The blades were retracted but now the seat belt held her firmly in place. Jazz looked at her.

Sideswipe observed how Amber's expression changed. It calmed, her features relaxing. He was about to ask what was going on until she started to speak.

"Early in the Cybertronian Civil War..." It was like she was reading from an ancient book "...the Autobots were in a disadvantage. Their warriors were mostly peaceful citizens. Not trained warriors like Megatron's forces. That's when the High Consul decided it was time they as well made soldiers. The used the last key of Vector Sigma to create such mechs, but it is said that, that orn Primus got angry and sealed off what was left of the destroyed by Megatron link to the Well of Sparks. But only a single spark emerged. It pulsed strongly, too strongly, until it separated. It created the last set of twins." She paused and Sideswipe didn't realize that the seat belt was loosening.

"Two young soldiers, both forced in this war protested against the idea of putting the innocent sparks in warrior built bodies. Naturally they were ignored and the warriors where created."

"Much time has passed since then. The warriors grew up strong and fearless. They even circled many of the underground gladiator rings and prevailed as victorious. But even so, they never had a name. The were known as the Red Daemon and the Setting Sun."

Amber again paused, her expression turned grim as the story progressed. Sideswipe had long retracted the seat belt, drinking in every word the human said. This tale was his nightmare.

"The two soldiers found the Red Daemon and the Setting Sun in an abandon gladiator arena. Both hidden from the outside world. Hidden from the horrors they saw here, existing out there. The two soldiers gave them a choice. They could either parish here or..."

"Or take a step towards the new sunrise" Sideswipe finished for her quietly, remembering those words that shall never be forgotten.

Amber gave a barely there smile and continued the story that was coming to an end " The two soldiers gave the Red Daemon and the Setting Sun something no one has ever given them. They gave them designations that were theirs and theirs only. The two brothers, the ex-gladiators were named Sunstreaker and Sideswipe."

The quietness in the car returned, only this time there was no tension in the air. The rain wasn't as hard anymore and Amber leaned in her seat to gently pat the cars cup board.

"It is a pleasure to finally meet you" She looked at the glowing spark next to her head. "Jazz has told me so much about you..._Sideswipe_"

The cars engine revved again but this time it wasn't from anger but excitement and hope. Hope he hasn't felt since...he couldn't even remember.

* * *

><p><strong>This chapter is specially dedicated to <em><span>Leda-Sky<span>_ who drew the most amazning picture of Amber with Jazz and her OC. Here's the link!**

http: / moonwalker00. deviantart. com/favourites/#/d4fp8k2 **(remove the space) Isn't it awesome?**

**This chap. is also dedicated for _bee-roxs98_ because she's been such a wonderful beta reader and a huge fan of Siders :D**

**PS: I also have a few drawings of Amber with Jazz at my DA account but ignore them. Focus on the incredible job _Leda-Sky_ did!**


	8. Chapter 8

_Burning in the Shadows_

_Chapter Eight : Waking life_

* * *

><p>"Faster!" Amber yelled at Sideswipe, her eyes trying to keep track of Jazz.<p>

"Any faster than this and we'll get noticed by the cops sweet-cheeks." The cars engine rumbled but even so the speed went up.

"We'll miss him! I can barely see him now!" Distress colored her voice as her eyes squinting trying to track of the now very faint, distant glowing orb. The cars engine accelerated and they went 40 over the limit.

"Kid, what the hell happened? Wasn't he here with you?" Sideswipe asked Amber as she frowned.

"I don't know what happened." Amber watched as they gained speed, the car going way to fast for a normal human contraction. "We were just talking and then suddenly he said he could feel him and bolted."

"Yeah, Jazz never was predictable after all."

"Watch out!" Amber shrieked as Sideswipe dangerously passed a truck, almost brushing it's paint. She felt the seatbelt tighten around her.

"Relax blondie. I'm one of the fastest 'bots here on earth now. I'm not going to crash!" Amusement laced Sideswipe's voice making Amber frown deeply, still trying to keep her eyes on Jazz.

"Somehow that doesn't make me feel better..." Amber watched as the glowing orb gained more speed. "I am shocked Jazz is going so fast just to get to _him_..." Amber growled slightly annoyed, although she knew Jazz wanted to get to Prowl, she didn't want to loose him.

"Who's _Him_?" The silver car asked.

Amber's frown turned in to a grimace as she answered "…Prowl"

The speed only accelerated.

* * *

><p>Jazz stopped in front of a parked police car.<p>

_"…Prowl?"_ He whispered but when he got no response he got closer and asked louder. _"Prowler?"_ But the car just didn't hear him.

_"Come on love."_ He tried to touch the car but it repelled him. That has never happened before. Jazz started to glow even brighter, indicating his distress.

_"Please, please, please answer me!"_ He pleaded and flew franticly around the car. _"Come on! Prowl!"_ He screamed._ "Ah did not look this long for you to not see me!"_ He flew over the car and hit it's hood by his small form. The car did not even flinch.

_"PROWLER!"_ He shrieked. Jazz was about to scream some more at him but the car suddenly started transforming. Hope started to grow in his spark. Maybe…maybe Prowl heard him!

But that hope perished when he noticed his bond mate online his weapons. He was about to ask what the heck was going on but a shriek and a low curse had him turning around.

Right there stood a fully transformed Sideswipe and a frightened Amber sitting on the ground.

* * *

><p>"B-Big..." Was all Amber could muster as she watched the big form of Sideswipe. She knew they were big, Jazz had told her that but….only now did Amber fully realize that they were so huge in person.<p>

"Aw frag!" Sideswipe cursed and brought out his blades with a almost silent hiss. "Primus must be in a mood today." He muttered and observed as the cybertronian in front of his brought out their weapons.

"….Who is that?" Amber finally asked as she regained her footing and went behind Sideswipe.

"That's Barricade. That's one mean 'con to handle." The silver warrior growled not happy admitting that this con was a skilled fighter. Barricade was different from the other 'cons. That's what made his stronger – he was smart, very start. He used his CPU when fighting leaving him victorious in many battles.

"Your going to have to take cover Blondie!" He took a fighting stance. "Things are bout to get a whole lot messier." Sideswipe growled glaring at Barricade.

Amber bit her lower lip as she observed the other alien being. He seemed so much more frightening than Sideswipe, it was way more spikier and darker in colors with red optics that Amber knew it indicated he was a Decepticon. She was about to say something but that was forgotten when she noticed a blue orb floating around the 'con. And that was when her body acted on instinct.

"Jazz!" She yelled and ran at full speed toward the 'con "Jazz!" She yelled louder and watched as the orb finally noticed her. The floating spark flew strait at her, knocking her to the ground.

"Ow…What the hell Jazz?" Amber sat up completely oblivious to the world around her.

Jazz looked franticly between her and the 'con who was now taking aim at Sideswipe.

_"Amber, baby. You have to get out of here! Now!"_

"What, no!" She yelled in a way that it sounded enraged, as got away from Jazz who was pushing her away. "You said Prowl was near! We could find him and ask him to help!" She protested. Jazz was about to answer but a loud boom stopped him. The two of them looked over, the battle had started. Jazz knew it wont be long before reinforcements came. Which was good for Sides, but for…

"Sideswipe!" Amber yelled when the silver warrior took a bad hit to the side.

_"It'll take much more than that to take down 'Swipe, sparklin'."_ Jazz reassured Amber who had a panicked look on her face and proceeded to guide Amber away.

"But we have to help him! He's going to get killed!" Funny a small human against a huge and deadly Decepticon.

_"There's noting you can do Am. The least you can do is get away and give them space, otherwise you'll get caught in the fire."_

Amber watched helplessly as the two giant alien robots fought.

* * *

><p>"Long time no see 'Cade. Where did that turbo rat Frenzy ran of to? Oh, I remember – he got beheaded by a human!" Sideswipe charged but barricade effortlessly avoided. Sideswipe cursed. He was low on fuel – the long drive tired him more than he thought. He just hoped back up would be here soon.<p>

"Pitiful Autobot!" Barricade fired his missiles, a couple of them hitting their intended target. "You should have stayed away from this planet, like your cowered brother!" That only seemed to fuel Sideswipe's anger as he laded a couple of strikes on the 'con.

"Never call me brother that again you scum!" Sideswipe charged and the two Cybertronians proceeded in hand-to-hand combat. Sideswipe soon found himself pinned, his neck cables being pressured more closer, cutting the flow of energon to his CPU. He was low on energy to begin with so it wasn't a surprise when he went in to stasis lock. The last thought Sideswipe had was

_'Primus, Ratch' will be furious'_ And the world was no more to him.

Barricade just stood there lingering over the fallen body.

* * *

><p>"He's down!" Amber yelled no longer containing her self. "Jazz, we have to do something, anything!" She pleaded. Amber watched as the orb started to dim.<p>

_"Am, baby... There's something I gotta tell you first."_ Jazz regarded her. He knew this could make her hate him and in a way he deserved it.

"What? Now?" Amber looked between Jazz and the 'con at the other side.

_"I already found Prowl."_ Stated Jazz and watched her expression turn in pure joy.

"Jazz that's wonderful!" She exclaimed. "Where is he?" Hope radiated from her. The orb dimmed dangerously low and answered in a whisper.

_"…In front of you."_ But Amber heard it loud and clear.

Amber looked confused for a moment. She was about to ask what he meant as she suddenly went still and looked horrified at the 'con in front of her as it all slowly clicked in her head.

"….That's Prowl?" She whispered. "Prowl is 'con?" Her voice slowly raised. "Prowl is a fucking decepticon!" She exploded, her face was red with fury. She usually restrained her self from using such words but even that word couldn't describe how pissed off she felt right now.

"You lied to me Jazz!" She leaned into Jazz with a sneer covering her face.

_"Ah know and I'm sorry-"_

"'Sorry?' So you say your sorry for purposely lying to me, making me believe we were after some one good, some on who deserved to be saved." There were no words to describe how angry Amber was. "I left my family to help you, my life, my brother!" Amber's face was so close to Jazz's spark now. "Is everything you've told me a lie?" But her voice broke "…Do I mean anything to you?" She finally whispered. "I thought we were friends…."

_"Oh Primus, baby. Yes! You do."_ Jazz, even though dead, felt his spark break slightly, Amber meant much to him. He never wanted her to think that they were nothing or that he just used her. _"And Ah promise, I will tell you everything!"_ He gently brushed her with his warm spark.

_"But he couldn't see me, he couldn't hear me. Am, he didn't even feel me."_ Amber heard how sad he was. _"Ah know I have no right to ask this but you need to tell him you can see me."_ Amber just gave him a tired eye look.

* * *

><p>Barricade knelt in front of the fallen body, checking if it was alive. He observed as that there were no lethal wounds on it's frame. He was about to leave when his scanners detected a life form approaching. He would have been surprised at the fact that this small human was not afraid of him.<p>

"Hey!" It yelled, he sneered at the insect, but it wouldn't back down. "Your Barricade, right?" It asked. He was about to leave when it, no it was a she, called him again. And this time it used a different name.

"Prowl!" She yelled but as soon as those words left her mouth the huge Decepticon tuned and in one swift move caught her in his servo in a tight hold.

"How do you know that name!" The 'con growled.

Amber trembled and looked at the orb that was floating next to her.

"…..I know who you are because Jazz told me." She chocked out slightly breathless. "…I can see your dead bond mate." The only response Amber got was the tightening of her hold.

* * *

><p><strong>Thank you bee-rox98 for the beta :) I really do hope you wonderful readers enjoyed the new chapter and sorry for the delay ^^<strong>


	9. Chapter 9

_Burning in the Shadows_

_Chapter Nine: Fairytale Gone Bad_

* * *

><p>Ever since she was a five year old Amber knew you had to be strong in order to survive. You can't let others carry your burdens because you can't rely on them. That was a lesson she learned early in her life. Her dad was just starting his career in the police and barely had time for his family (but he tried, God, did he try), and her mom had just given birth to her baby brother – she didn't have the time to spare more attention to her eldest daughter.<p>

But that was okay with Amber.

She was happy and content with her life. A perfectly normal, ordinary and simple life. Amber _loved_ it. That was until her father was killed. It was then that the ground crumbled beneath her feet and the worlds weight started to crush her. It was then that a massive whole tore it self in her heart and it has yet to be filled.

Basically, Amber had to grow up. She didn't really had a choice – not when her mother was having an emotional breakdown and her little brother needed support more then ever. So Amber grew up. She was there for her family. She helped them get back on their feet. But the problem was that there was no one to help Amber back on _her_ feet. So when things finally started to calm down, when her mother was stable enough and her brother could once again smile a true, happy smile that she realized that she was still drifting away.

That anger started to slowly grow inside of her. And that anger intensified even more when her mother remarried. She tried talking to her mother. She really did. But her mother had gotten so used to the idea that her daughter had grown up that she didn't give her the attention she needed. And that's when the anger morphed in to something else - hatred. Hatred towards her mother and adoptive father. Hatred towards her teachers and friends. She hated the world in general. Because she hated being a shadow in it.

And that's when Jazz came in her life. It was scary at first. More than once did she question her sanity. But things...changed. The moment she had a civilized conversation with the deceased Autobot did she found a purpose in the world. No longer did she feel a shadow because some one needed her. Oh, how she relished the feeling of being needed, wanted.

Jazz made her feel...whole again. There was something missing in her life and Jazz somehow chased the loneliness away. Because he cared for her. He...became the father she lost. Screw the fact that they were different species. Forget that he was technically dead. The concern in his voice or his laughter, when he praised her and advised her like only a father could, Amber felt like she never had before.

A child.

Her heart swelled with joy every time he laughed with her, every time she was able to lift his mood up. It was the least she could do by helping him. He lifted the anger that was consuming her heart. His spark was so bright that it chased away her nightmares, the darkness and so warm that even under the heaviest and coldest of rains she felt the warmth radiate from him.

Around him she was her age, she was the 13 year old Amber. A child who enjoyed reading books about physics and hated sugary sweets. She was Amber and the fact that he accepted her chased away the daemons that lurked inside her.

So, even when he lied to her. Even when he hid the truth from her and placed her in danger she did not have the strength to hate him. Oh, she was pissed alright. She was very much indeed angry. But she did not hate him. She couldn't afford...she didn't have the strength to afford to lose a father for the second time. So she stood there, head tall and eyes even thought consumed with fright, looking straight at Barricade.

"Do _not_ temp me fleshling!" Barricade tightened his hold on the small organic. "If you value your life you will not mention that name again." He sneered.

"What name?" She trembled and yet never broke contact with his optics, "Jazz?...or _Prowl_?"

_'Am... now is not the time to be aggravating him.' _Jazz spoke concerned. It pained him to admit that he didn't trust Prowl with Amber. Not when he was like this.

_'He has an aggression program Am. Even if he has regained his consciousness as Prowl he is still very unstable - '_

"Shut up!" Amber yelled. "I am so sick of this!" She looked at Jazz ignoring Prowl/Barricades look, "What do you want me to do? What?" She yelled, pure adrenalin compromising her thoughts.

"I am so fucking _sick_ of this! Of the lies, the threats, the whole fucking world!" Jazz knew that she was truly upset. Amber never cursed. Never. And today she did it twice. "Listen to me you robotic bastard!" She turned her attention to the 'con in front of her. She didn't realize she was crying. Barricade growled threateningly but she ignored him completely.

"I told you I can see and speak with your bond mate! _Bond_. _Mate_! Are so glitched you can't understand simple english!" She was sobbing and she didn't even know why. "I am offering to help you and all you do is growl at me! Well _fuck_ you Prowl or Barricade, or who ever the hell you are!"

_'AMBER!'_

"No! Fuck you too Jazz! I'm sick of lies! I've had enough of them to last a lifetime!" Later Amber would realize that having an emotional breakdown in the clutches of a 'con probably wasn't the best idea but she was tired. She was oh so tired. Of everything.

"Prove it." A deep rumbled voice interrupted her. Barricade brought the tear-stained girl in front of his optics. "Prove to me that you are telling the truth; that you can see and hear….Jazz."

Amber took a couple of breaths to calm her self and looked at Jazz. The former saboteur felt a piece of his spark crumble by the desperate look Amber gave him. Even now she was still helping him.

_'Amber...sweetspark...'_

"What should I tell him Jazz?"

* * *

><p>Barricade observed the human youngling. It'll probably take him a second to crush her. If he just tightened his grip a little more he will crush her small body and her life will be no more. But...he couldn't anymore. Not when he remembers who he is...who he <em>was<em>. A part of him wished he didn't. The horrible things he has done as a 'con will forever haunt his processor. But the important thing is he remembered.

Maybe it was the shattering of the bond or something caused by injuries, but not long after Mission City did he wake up one night from recharge and he simply...knew. Vorns and vorns of destruction on his part and all it took were measly couple of human hours for him to remember. Everything.

And now this miserable human in his claws was stating she could see and talk to his dead bond mate. Bond mate he was willing to give everything so he could be with him again. But that was impossible. Jazz was dead. _He_ was not. _He_ merely excised. The other 'cons don't know he has woken up. But he resumes to be in alliance with them. _Bah_, alliance. He simply uses their energon. The 'bots will never welcome him back. _He_ doesn't want to go back. Not after everything he has done.

He has lost everything. There was nothing left for him to lose. So what was the point?

"Y-you and Jazz bonded in Praxus. T-the crystal gardens." That snapped the 'con to look at the human in front of him. His energon started to boil, aggression program kicking in, picking up his emotions. "It was a small ceremony. Close friends and family."

Barricade sneered. "You could have easily found archives of that!"

Amber flinched, "Okay...umm Jazz said the two of you met by accident, with you trying to arrest him. He was locked outside of the Enforcers HQ."

"Again, information you could gain from witnesses and archives." He was not impressed and his patience was wavering.

"Damn it Jazz, give me something to work with here." She looked worriedly to her side. But there was nothing there. Barricade even scanned to make sure. Still nothing.

"I am tired of this." She squeaked when his claws tightened, "Leave now before I change my mind and kill you fleshling." He released the child on the ground and transformed. The others where coming – both Autobots and Decepticons. They probably picked up the commotion.

"No wait! Please!" She yelled after him and ran on unsteady feet. Barricade ignored her. But then she said something. Something that made his spark run cold.

"YOU AND JAZZ HAD A SPARKLING!" She yelled with all of her might, "Before the war! Before the destruction of Praxus the two of you had Nightwish!"

The screeching of tires could be herd as Barricade came to a sudden stop. That name...he hasn't herd that name since... Impossible! Only he and Jazz knew about the existence of... only _they_ mourned the loss of their child during the attack of Praxus. Only they knew of her existence – not even Prime. _Only_ they. And yet, this mere organic...Impossible!

He looked at the girl. She was staring wide eyed at the space next to her. At nothing. She looked horrified, as if just realizing what she had just said.

Barricade used that time to run away. Not that he will ever admit that. He was Barricade. He never ran away. Never. And yet his spark, something he thought he no longer possessed, keened at the loss of his family.

Nightwish.

Jazz.

_Prowl_ ran.

* * *

><p>Amber stood frozen in place. She wasn't looking at the fleeing Barricade, instead she looked at the dim orb in front of her. And suddenly, everything made sense. Perfect, crystal-clear sense.<p>

"_At some point Ah started believing that Ah was in the Pit, that Ah was being punished." _The night before their departure, the night Jazz broke in front of her for the first time. The first time she truly saw how tired, just like her, Jazz was. The memories flooded her and suddenly something made 'click'.

_"Ah want Prowl, Ah want to go home." _

_"I want my family back." _

Oh God, Amber thought as new tears started to fall from her eyes. All this time. All of this time he wasn't referring to just Prowl as family...

"You had a child?" She croaked, voice hoarse. "W-why didn't you tell me?"

Jazz remained silent and if possible the light dimmed even more.

"Jesus Christ, Jazz." She ran her hands over her face. "God, this is _so_ messed up." She looked at the fallen Sideswipe and went next to him. Jazz silently followed. He was almost snuggled in her neck. She was the only thing he could actually touch and feel. He needed that contact. Now. More then ever.

Exhausted, Amber slid down and rested next to the fallen form of the front liner. She used her hand and gently started to pet Jazz.

_'Do ya ...hate me?'_ A quiet voice asked. She stopped her petting, just for a second but answered right away.

"...No. I could never hate you. Even if I wanted." She rested her head on the warm metal and brought Jazz to her lap. "This is just so... so..."

_'Messed up?'_

"I was going to use a more vulgar word, but yeah. Messed up works too." She brought her knees closer, clutching Jazz harder, fearing he might disappear after Prowl.

"...Why didn't you tell me Jazz? I thought you trusted me..." She closed her eyes, "I trusted _you_."

_'Primus, give me strength...' _Jazz muttered and pushed closer to the small body, _'If I told ya the truth... would you have helped me?_'

"Yes!" She looked shocked at him. Of course!

_'But Ah couldn't take that risk. Ah just couldn't sweetspark.'_ Amber remained silent, allowing him finish, _'I...We, Prowler and I have lost so much in this fraggin' war. _So_ much... And now he's all alone._ _Just like me. But Ah found you. And for the first time in forever I felt hope kindle in mah spark. But Ah was afraid you would leave me,_ _that Ah would be alone again.' _Amber felt the spark shudder.

_'Primus helm me Amber but if I lose you...if I lose you nothing can be done for Prowl. He will die a slow, agonizing and most of all lonely death. And I will simply watch it happen. Until the two of us go to the Well of Sparks. Ah don't now how I manged to stay here for so long, but Ah _am_ here. _This_ is a second chance and I wont frag it up. Ah wont let that happen!'_

"And I'll help you." He herd Amber mutter.

_'I really, really am sorry Amber. I never wished to see ya hurt. And today, I was the one that caused ya pain. Primus, I'm so, _so_ sorry Amber.'_

She smiled gently at him. "You are forgiven Jazz." He was forgiven but the deed was not forgotten. It will never be. "I..." She hesitated, not really comfortable talking emotions like this. She was never really good at it. "I got angry because you reminded me of him, of dad. He always promised he will make it for my birthday or school recital...but he never did. There's still always more work to be done. Always, all of the time. So I simply stopped asking, tired of his lies." She looked away. She never told anyone that.

"He...he promised he'll return early one night so we could go to the movies. Just the two of us." She bitterly laughed, "I was such a fool to believe him. He had some sort of an emergency. He called to tell me that he wont make it. Typical. I shouldn't have gotten so upset, but I did." Suddenly she stopped and pulled Jazz closer, basking in his warmth.

"I told him some real mean things over the phone Jazz. Called him a liar, just like I did to you. Said that I hate him and simply hung up. The next morning we got a phone call. I thought it was dad again, you know, to apologize for being late and all but..." Her voice broke.

"_God_, was I wrong." She looked at the darkening sky, rain clods gathering. "Just by the look on my moms face I knew something had happened. It was then that I just _knew_ that I'll never see him again." She fought hard the tears. She had cried enough for one day. Hell, she had cried enough to last a lifetime. No more.

"And today it was just like before. The lies, everything. And for a moment there, I believed you were gonna leave me so you could go with _him_. If that's not selfish I don't know what is. But in the end you're still here, with me. I can't bring my self to hate you. I want to, but I just can't Jazz. I can never hate you."

She looked strait at the glowing orb and gently brushed a hand over it, fondness covering her young face, "I can never hate you Jazz. Not when I love you like a father."

They were together for almost an year. But only a couple of months ago did she finally acknowledged his existence. For Jazz, in this form, where he couldn't recharge or refuel, time went agonizingly slow. It may have been barely a human year but for him it felt much, _much_ longer. A day felt like a month, a month like an year and an year like a vorn. So even if he tried, Jazz couldn't stop the words that escaped him.

_'I am proud to call you my creation Amber.'_ No, he will never forget Nightwish. Amber would never replace her in his spark. His spark simply grew more now that Amber has a place in it.

"Nhhgg, who the hell are you talking to squishy?" Sideswipe finally started to regain consciousness.

"Jazz." She smiled not minding being addressed that way.

The front liner moaned."So I didn't imagine you? Suck."

Amber stood up on shaky legs, adrenalin finally letting go of her body.

"Huh, you're in a better condition then I thought." She looked at his body. There were only scratches and dents – at least that's what Jazz told her. No leaks so he was simply knocked out.

_'Of course he is. Prowl is awake. He may be under an aggression program but he is still Prowl. He still remembers the twins.'_ Jazz flew over Sideswipe checking his entire body. Just as he predicted, the front liner was fine.

"Where did the decepticreep ran of too?" The warrior asked. Amber moved back, giving Sideswipe space to sit. She was still intimidated by their height. Plus, his blades were still not retracted.

Just as Amber was about to answer a loud honk startled her.

_'Well, it looks like the cavalry has arrived.' _Said Jazz and flew next to the kid. The blonde frowned, not sure what to expect.

"About fraggin' time!" Sideswipe complained but Amber simply tensed as a lot of vehicles and military men emerged from the corner of the street.

"Well, well, well." A man stepped out of a military car. Sideswipe moaned when he saw the human.

_'Oh for the love of Primus... _He's_ still here?' _Jazz's voice was quite irritated.

"Who is he?" Whispered Amber and took a couple of steps back when the man approached.

_'A pain in the aft...'_ Muttered Jazz. Oh, how he wished he had his body. He had a bone to pick with this human after what he did to Sam and Mikaela. And especially Bumblebee...

"I am agent Seymour Simmons and you little missy have a lot of explaining to do." Amber simply narrowed her eyes while Jazz growled. This day just keeps getting better and better.

* * *

><p>Disclaimer: I don't own Transformers<p>

_Interesting facts: I wanted all of you to understand with this chapter that Amber is still a kid. Yes, she is 13 but that is still very young. Also, this shows us more of her psyche. Amber never really did have a childhood, always being the adult. But around Jazz she can relax and let someone else worry for a change. (not that she will ever admit that or completely relax – especially now)_

_And lets not forget. She is entering puberty so her emotions are even more unstable._

_Thank you for your patience, dear readers =) I hope you haven't forgotten this fic and enjoyed the new chapter. ^^ _

_~MW_


	10. Chapter 10

**Important. Please read!**

OK, I'm going to be blunt. I hate Amber and so far, this story is not progressing the way it should be. It's my fault, really. I made her too Mary Sue. And I hate that. I honestly can't stand reading fics containing such OCs, let alone write about one. So, I'm sad to announce that these series are getting canceled. I'm sorry, but I can no longer force myself to write something I don't like. It's not fair to you, dear readers, and to me as well.

But I have good news. I'm canceling this story, but the idea about Jazz being an aimlessly floating spark is something I love too much to simply abandon. I have already started the first couple of drafts. It's going to feature a couple of OC's. It's not going to be Mary Sue, like this one, but rather of multiple characters that I'll try and make them unique in their own way. So, summed up – from a PG this story will turn mature. A re-write. And by M, I don't mean interfacing or sex or something of the sort. It's going to be realistic and 'grown up' so to speak, or at least I'll try to make it as such.

Sneak peak: The main Autobot it'll be focused on will be Jazz again. That is certain. And Amber will be a part of the new series as well. But she will be different in a way and have a different role.

This will forever be the first TF story featuring an OC I have ever written and nothing is going to change that. It's going to get re- written in order to get improved. My English has improved greatly and hopefully the new story will be more easy and enjoyable to read :)

Thank you, readers, for all the support you have given me. Please note that this was not an easy decision for me to make and that it is _final_. Nothing will change my mind about it. Don't worry. If you like this story, you'll like the new one. If someone has questions and stuff, feel free to ask =)

Now, no killing me in my sleep,

Sincerely, MoonWallker (pjlover666)


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